I have been married to my wife Pat for ten years; needless to say that this is my second marriage. I learned a lot along the way and made a bunch of mistakes as well. Pat works hard; until recently she cared for her aging mother and is truly a great person and wife. Every day for as long as I can remember I have been bringing Pat coffee in bed in the morning. Early in our marriage I did this without giving it a second thought, until I discovered how much she really likes it. Now this small act of love and kindness has taken on a whole new meaning for me and for her as well. It’s small, no bells and whistles, no motive, it’s actually fun. An added bonus is we get to spend some time together talking about the news, our day, or our kids.
For my youngest daughter Zoe who is at times driven to school I ready her backpack and lunch box in the morning and place it in the car for her. I know they’re suppose to learn responsibility, I got it but often I wonder how we will help our daughters to recognize positive qualities in a partner if we don’t show them what it looks like; I also like holding the car door for all of my daughters (ages 15, 28, and 34) as an example of kindness and courtesy. The small things are the big things.
My oldest daughters 28 and 34 have been through this and don’t live with me any longer. But, I always send a text of a heart or a short I am thinking of you message. They know no response is needed, and I know they appreciate it.
We were all children once, and to our parents we will always be their children. They will always have difficulty getting out from under the memory of what we looked like and how we acted when we were infants, toddlers, tweens, and teens. Whether we get along with them or not, we owe them, something. It might be a phone call, an invite to dinner, or just a card letting them know that we love them. If your parents are no longer and have passed away try to keep them in your heart and keep them in your memory during the holidays or on what would have been their birthday. If there is a divide between you and your parents make it right and I mean this minute. Don’t allow the time to pass because days become weeks and then years and if things aren’t right and they do pass away the guilt could be a lifetime burden for you. We will all have the memory of our parents kicking around in our head and by dealing with any issues that you have with them now you avoid the nightmare of being haunted from the grave.